I am finding, in my somewhat limited interactions with foreigners, that there are a lot of differences between Americans and Europeans as far as romance and dating go. Earlier this month I went on a ten day tour and cruise of Greece and its islands. Everybody warned me about Greek men - so much so that I thought I was going to be kidnapped and forced to marry, a little like the Greek myth of the Lapith princesses and the brutish centaurs (depicted in stone on the Temple of Zeus front pediment, for viewing in the museum at Olympia). But it was nothing I couldn't handle, or nothing I haven't heard before, for that matter. I just put on my best affronted face -- friends who know me, know this face well!!
Now I'm not very good at confrontation, so at first it was kind of uncomfortable for me to fend them off, but I tried to be gracious about it. Except for the guy who asked me for coffee, admitted he had been following me while meandering around the city for a half hour, and tried to suck my face... Uh, all I can say to defend that choice is free espresso...
But now that I'm back, their straightforwardness is missed. In fact, it has me wishing more American men were like Greek men.... hell, then at least I'd know where I stand.
Take M. for example...
We've gone to a few events together, and our status is somewhere between just friends and makeout buddies. I enjoy his company, and we've got a few hobbies in common, but its never progressed any farther. I figure, if he was interested, he'd ask me on a date - what any dude should do. And its totally cool if he's just not that into me - I'm progressive like that. I would only care if I was super interested. But wait a minute -- is he?? Hence my confusion...
Not a day goes by where I don't get a text or IM from him. Most of the time, it is a meaningless, messageless text that doesn't require a response. BTW guys, that's super annoying. (If you have nothing to say, don't say anything at all.) For example..."I'm going _ on Saturday." Uhh... cool? Are you trying to invite me? Do you want my permission? Approval? Or are you just trying to keep a lackluster conversation rolling?
That brings me to my point. You are either a) interested but lacking balls -- err, confidence or b) not interested enough to get the ball rolling yourself. I'm just going to assume the latter. I'm not going to take anything you do seriously, and I'm not going to throw you a bone.
And please, ESPECIALLY do not wait until I'm drunk - to improve your chances of being better received - to drop the bombshell that you've really liked me all this time we've been hanging out just as friends... you are ALREADY in the friends zone and YOU ARE A PUSSY at best or a horndog at worst to try to take advantage of the alcoholic haze instead of being legit about your so-called feelings when you're sober. I can honestly say I've had xx guy friends do that to me over the years - and what's much more impressive to me is sitting me down, looking me in the eye, and saying, 'I would like to take you on a date. I like you.' To sum it up... if you like a girl, be direct. Don't beat around the bush. Confidence is sexy. Lameness is not!!
Now I'm not very good at confrontation, so at first it was kind of uncomfortable for me to fend them off, but I tried to be gracious about it. Except for the guy who asked me for coffee, admitted he had been following me while meandering around the city for a half hour, and tried to suck my face... Uh, all I can say to defend that choice is free espresso...
But now that I'm back, their straightforwardness is missed. In fact, it has me wishing more American men were like Greek men.... hell, then at least I'd know where I stand.
Take M. for example...
We've gone to a few events together, and our status is somewhere between just friends and makeout buddies. I enjoy his company, and we've got a few hobbies in common, but its never progressed any farther. I figure, if he was interested, he'd ask me on a date - what any dude should do. And its totally cool if he's just not that into me - I'm progressive like that. I would only care if I was super interested. But wait a minute -- is he?? Hence my confusion...
Not a day goes by where I don't get a text or IM from him. Most of the time, it is a meaningless, messageless text that doesn't require a response. BTW guys, that's super annoying. (If you have nothing to say, don't say anything at all.) For example..."I'm going _ on Saturday." Uhh... cool? Are you trying to invite me? Do you want my permission? Approval? Or are you just trying to keep a lackluster conversation rolling?
That brings me to my point. You are either a) interested but lacking balls -- err, confidence or b) not interested enough to get the ball rolling yourself. I'm just going to assume the latter. I'm not going to take anything you do seriously, and I'm not going to throw you a bone.
And please, ESPECIALLY do not wait until I'm drunk - to improve your chances of being better received - to drop the bombshell that you've really liked me all this time we've been hanging out just as friends... you are ALREADY in the friends zone and YOU ARE A PUSSY at best or a horndog at worst to try to take advantage of the alcoholic haze instead of being legit about your so-called feelings when you're sober. I can honestly say I've had xx guy friends do that to me over the years - and what's much more impressive to me is sitting me down, looking me in the eye, and saying, 'I would like to take you on a date. I like you.' To sum it up... if you like a girl, be direct. Don't beat around the bush. Confidence is sexy. Lameness is not!!
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