journey to the altar

A few months back, I told you that I met a great guy with whom I am now involved.

Meaning, I’m not single anymore. I am in a committed, long-term relationship. But if you want to get technical – I’m not married – so legally, I’m single. I file taxes as a single person. I check the ‘Miss,’ not ‘Mrs.’ box. So by all intents and purposes, I’m single.

So prior to this relationship, I was documenting my experiences in dating survival. But now that I’ve got the perfect man, what’s left to write about? Weeeeeeeeeelll – an embarrassingly big shiny rock on my left hand wouldn’t hurt!! Only thing… I don’t have it yet. A small and easy-to-manage detail...

We’re in love, he’s met my family, we’ve talked about marriage, we’ve looked at rings, he’s even (gasp!) asked my parents for my hand. So, what’s the hold up? 

Looks like I’m going to have to get crafty. Ever heard of engagement chicken? I’m vegetarian, so I’m SOL on that one. Instead, I made “engagement crab” for our Christmas dinner. I think its going to be all the rage. You heard it here first people.

Another way I'm getting crafty... reverse psychology. (Not sure how well this is going to work in my favor considering I get drunk sometimes... and CANNOT shut up.) I tell Jeff I'm not in any hurry, I'm fine with him taking his time and saving up money, I don't want to pressure him, I'm enjoying our time "dating," blah blah blah you know all those excuses girls tell themselves when they fantasize about hearing that sentence of 4 words and wonder what is taking so long. C'mon, you know what I'm talking about ladies!!! I even go so far as saying, I don't want a big expensive ring baby, don't spend a lot of money (Lie) I don't want a ring at all baby (Lie) I just want to be with you baby! (Truth when accompanied by prepositional phrase '- after you propose to me with a giant gorgeous diamond')

In all seriousness, I would be happy if he proposed to me with a simple little speech and a twisty tie to keep my finger warm. What I wouldn't be happy about is fielding all the question - WHERE IS YOUR RING? - from people when I make my engagement announcement.

But on the other hand, I get it. I get why the ring is part of it. Embarking on marriage takes a leap of faith. When a man proposes, he's promising to not only commit with his heart and body, but with his resources as well. It's an investment in you and your life together. He's supposed to spend some moolah -- at a cost equaling 2-3 months of take home pay -- to prove to you that he's serious about spending his life with you. And think about it, it's gotta be nice -- the ring is supposed to last the rest of your life and look as gorgeous as the first day you put it on.

AND he's supposed to sweat a little when he buys it. When he sees his bank account go to near zero. When he thinks of the boat or the car he could've bought with that money. It's that sacrifice that partly makes an engagement ring meaningful. Because the boat or the car or the vacation or nameless wish list item is not what makes him happy -- it's you.  

Still waiting.... sigh.